“I could shit pure fury”
My friend is at a new temp job. They’re making him use one of those ergonomic/split keyboards and a trackball. It’s not going well.
My friend is at a new temp job. They’re making him use one of those ergonomic/split keyboards and a trackball. It’s not going well.
But seriously, can’t anything just be awesome and relaxed, like when you meet an amazing new friend and you think, holy shit, how have we not known each other our whole lives? How, on a date, do you ever just click with someone and have a tremendously fun time unless one of you isn’t worried about sleeping with the other? I don’t know if it ever happens. Unless both (ok, at least one) of the people is semi-enlightened enough to still be relaxed while also getting more and more excited about how awesome this other person is. So, that’s a goal.
The Hunger Games was disappointing as a film. They glossed over tons of stuff. But…that’s just the thing. I never like when they make books into movies. Books don’t make good movies. Especially ones with really taciturn main characters and lots of backstory and tension-setup that needs to occur.
I mean, I’ve seen plenty of movies I liked that were books originally. But I hadn’t read the books.
Maybe I should.
In the class where we read Jane Eyre, the professor said we had to look at the movie as a different interpretation. Any book vs movie situation, it’s better, he said, to consider the film an artistic interpretation. And… Ok. From that perspective, I think the Hunger Games film is disappointingly lacking in what makes it so striking as a story—the scary inequality between the districts and the capitol city. Friends of work people who went with me hadn’t read the book and actually seemed confused as to why it was called the “hunger games,” so unaddressed did the issue go.
I think movies are better for old books that no one’s reading. Making something that is no longer really readable by the average person into something people will pay attention to, for the sake of passing on the story, or illustrating a historical period, etc. Even when they change things to give it a cleaner ending or skip over lots of slow things. There’s room to cut things out of books that address things that are no longer current issues. And older books are a lot slower paced.
Still, so much of what happens in books is in people’s heads. Especially important stuff, emotional connection stuff, motivations, what they’re thinking that they’re not saying out loud. Which is so much of ANY situation. Movies require simplicity of characters or very overt plots. To make a movie out of a book, you at least deserve a narrator or a voiceover. Or a miniseries.
Holy shit…THE SCARS OF YOUR LOVE REMIND ME OF US.
THEY KEEP ME THINKING THAT WE ALMOST HAD IT ALL.
THE SCARS OF YOUR LOVE, THEY LEAVE ME BREATHLESS.
I CAN’T HELP FEELING …
WE COULD HAVE HAD IT ALL!
ROLLING IN THE DEE-EE-EEEP!
WHAT AM I DOING IN HERE, TENNISON? QUITE SIMPLE, REALLY. I OWN THIS DRAWER, LIKE I OWN THIS COMPANY, AND I WILL OCCUPY WHATEVER PORTION OF THE COMPANY I FEEL LIKE, WHENEVER I FEEL LIKE, AND UNLESS YOU CAN FIND ‘EXPLAINING MY ACTIONS TO SLACKJAWED, BUNGLING ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES’ SOMEWHERE ON MY C.V. I SUGGEST YOU SIT DOWN AT THAT DESK I GRACIOUSLY ALLOW YOU TO HAVE AND STOP WASTING MY TIME WITH YOUR BABBLE. IF I WANTED TO BE DISAPPOINTED BY YOUR SEMI-COHERENT RAMBLING I’D CALL A SALES MEETING.
NOW WHERE ARE THOSE REPORTS I ASKED FOR?
STOP LOOKING AROUND, YOU TIT. I’M SITTING ON THEM. HOW DID YOU GET THIS JOB? AM I YOUR FATHER? DO YOU HAVE BLACKMAIL PHOTOS OF ME? CAN YOU EVEN READ, TENNISON?
I’M GOING TO GO DOWN TO 14 AND SLEEP IN THE 11”X17” PAPER TRAY IN THE COPY ROOM. I’LL BE BACK AT 3 AND I EXPECT YOU’LL HAVE THE SECOND QUARTER PROJECTIONS COMPLETED AND FAXED OVER TO MARTY.
| --------: | 5:03 PM |
|---|---|
| --------: | RickDickens77 is now online |
| RickDickens77: | Lou |
| LouisTheCat: | hey rick you made it |
| RickDickens77: | Yup we made it |
| RickDickens77: | Got to the hotel, started to unpack |
| RickDickens77: | And guess what we found |
| LouisTheCat: | what |
| RickDickens77: | SHUT UP |
| RickDickens77: | YOU KNOW WHAT WE FOUND |
| LouisTheCat: | lol yeah |
| LouisTheCat: | youre welcome |
| RickDickens77: | I didn't thank you |
| RickDickens77: | I'm pretty steamed this time Lou |
| LouisTheCat: | woah woah woah |
| LouisTheCat: | thats no way to react to a thoughtful gift |
| RickDickens77: | We can probably get the clothes washed |
| RickDickens77: | But the luggage is ruined. |
| LouisTheCat: | well pardon me for trying to give you something to remember me by |
| RickDickens77: | Urine? Really? |
| LouisTheCat: | what else do i have rick |
| LouisTheCat: | its not like i know how to take and print a photo |
| LouisTheCat: | actually thats not true i probably could have figured that out |
| RickDickens77: | You are a tremendous jerk. |
| LouisTheCat: | my bad |
| LouisTheCat: | but think about this rick |
| LouisTheCat: | when you packed that bag |
| LouisTheCat: | how long were you away from it between packing it and zipping it up |
| RickDickens77: | I don't know, a minute maybe. |
| LouisTheCat: | i dont know what that means but it wasnt very long |
| LouisTheCat: | and did you smell it |
| RickDickens77: | Of course not, I would have done something. |
| LouisTheCat: | exactly |
| RickDickens77: | What's your point |
| LouisTheCat: | think about the effort in timing that right |
| LouisTheCat: | it takes research rick |
| LouisTheCat: | i had to know exactly when to sneak in there |
| LouisTheCat: | do the business |
| LouisTheCat: | and get out |
| RickDickens77: | Am I supposed to appreciate that? |
| RickDickens77: | Am I supposed to go OH THANKS FOR TRYING SO HARD TO PEE ON MY CLOTHES LOU |
| LouisTheCat: | if you had a tiny shred of a soul maybe |
| RickDickens77: | Guess I don't then, because I'm just not seeing the upside. |
| LouisTheCat: | you disappoint me rick |
| RickDickens77: | YOU disappoint ME. |
| RickDickens77: | Emily's bag is a disaster too |
| RickDickens77: | She didn't even bring it inside at the house! |
| LouisTheCat: | im an artist rick |
| RickDickens77: | You're a menace. |
| --------: | 5:53 PM |
| RickDickens77: | We're going to dinner. I'll deal with you later. Has Heike shown up yet? |
| LouisTheCat: | what is a heike |
| RickDickens77: | I told you about the cat sitter. |
| LouisTheCat: | and i told you i didnt need a sitter |
| RickDickens77: | I know, and yet here we are. |
| RickDickens77: | I asked her to start tomorrow, but she was going to come by this evening to spend a little time getting to know you. |
| LouisTheCat: | well i look forward to it |
| RickDickens77: | Please be nice. |
| LouisTheCat: | no seriously i cant wait |
| LouisTheCat: | we can play some games |
| LouisTheCat: | talk about boys |
| LouisTheCat: | ill make us some snacks |
| RickDickens77: | Remember she's just helping to take care of you. |
| LouisTheCat: | taking care of me is your job |
| RickDickens77: | It's one of my jobs, yes |
| RickDickens77: | Unfortunately, my other job has me far away, so I can't do that job. |
| RickDickens77: | That's why I'm paying Heike. |
| LouisTheCat: | how much are you paying her |
| RickDickens77: | Doesn't matter. Gotta go. |
| LouisTheCat: | ah |
| LouisTheCat: | silent auction |
| LouisTheCat: | gotcha |
| --------: | 7:45 PM |
| RickDickens77: | How's it going Lou |
| RickDickens77: | Lou |
| --------: | 8:06 PM |
| LouisTheCat: | rick this lady is nuts |
| LouisTheCat: | i dont understand a word she says |
| RickDickens77: | Oh, yeah- she's German so she might sound funny to you |
| LouisTheCat: | this isnt funny its terrifying |
| LouisTheCat: | and wtf is german |
| RickDickens77: | From Germany. The country. |
| RickDickens77: | She knows English, she just probably doesn't think it matters to you. |
| LouisTheCat: | it matters |
| LouisTheCat: | i got this nutbag running around my house |
| LouisTheCat: | chasing me with a feather on a stick |
| LouisTheCat: | going bap bap bap bap bap bap bap bap like its words but its not words rick |
| LouisTheCat: | its not words at all |
| RickDickens77: | It's just a different language. Try to hang out with her, she wants to play. |
| --------: | 8:48 PM |
| LouisTheCat: | rick |
| LouisTheCat: | rick |
| LouisTheCat: | rick |
| LouisTheCat: | rick |
| LouisTheCat: | rick |
| --------: | 9:06 PM |
| RickDickens77: | What's up |
| RickDickens77: | I'm getting ready for bed |
| LouisTheCat: | rick |
| LouisTheCat: | i think heike is dead rick |
| RickDickens77: | What? |
| LouisTheCat: | rick shes dead |
| LouisTheCat: | its awful rick |
| LouisTheCat: | shes not moving in there |
| RickDickens77: | Woah, woah, woah |
| RickDickens77: | slow down and tell me what happened |
| RickDickens77: | I can call for help. |
| LouisTheCat: | ok so i was in the pantry right |
| LouisTheCat: | showing heike where the treats are |
| LouisTheCat: | and shes all bap bap bap bap bap bap bap |
| LouisTheCat: | i dont know |
| LouisTheCat: | like baby talk or something |
| RickDickens77: | Get to the part where she dies, please. |
| LouisTheCat: | so im like ok lets find some common ground right |
| LouisTheCat: | so i try playing that game you like |
| RickDickens77: | Catch The Giant Breakable Thing? |
| RickDickens77: | I hate that game. |
| LouisTheCat: | then why do you keep playing |
| RickDickens77: | Think about my choices, Lou. |
| RickDickens77: | anyway, go |
| RickDickens77: | what happened. |
| LouisTheCat: | well she sucks at it |
| LouisTheCat: | thats what happened |
| RickDickens77: | Ugh. |
| RickDickens77: | I'm calling 911 |
| LouisTheCat: | wait |
| LouisTheCat: | i hear her |
| LouisTheCat: | yeah shes talking |
| LouisTheCat: | hang on |
| RickDickens77: | Is she ok? |
| LouisTheCat: | i dont know that she was ever ok rick |
| LouisTheCat: | she seems the same as before if thats what you mean |
| RickDickens77: | Ok I'm calling her |
| LouisTheCat: | well now i dont think thats quite necessary |
| RickDickens77: | Too late, it's ringing. |
| LouisTheCat: | she left already you dont need to do that |
| RickDickens77: | I just want to make sure she's ok. |
| LouisTheCat: | shes driving away i can see her |
| RickDickens77: | Quiet. |
| --------: | 9:28 PM |
| RickDickens77: | Ok, so guess what, you got your wish. |
| LouisTheCat: | i didnt want this rick |
| RickDickens77: | No sitter? That's not what you wanted? |
| LouisTheCat: | ok so technically i wanted that |
| RickDickens77: | Yeah. Well you got it. |
| RickDickens77: | You should be ashamed of yourself. |
| LouisTheCat: | i was just playing a game rick |
| RickDickens77: | Several games, it sounds like. |
| RickDickens77: | Shred The Purse. |
| RickDickens77: | Pee On The Shoes And Coat, always a classic. |
| RickDickens77: | Ride The Hair, that's new! |
| LouisTheCat: | its the curls |
| LouisTheCat: | irresistible |
| RickDickens77: | So I'm stuck paying for a purse, a coat, a pair of shoes, a trip to the hair salon and probably an ER bill |
| RickDickens77: | And she didn't want to go into this one, but I'm also buying her a new bra. |
| LouisTheCat: | we had a moment |
| RickDickens77: | Apparently. |
| LouisTheCat: | did she mention the umbrella |
| RickDickens77: | She did not. |
| LouisTheCat: | give it time |
| RickDickens77: | Needless to say, I am annoyed. |
| LouisTheCat: | im sorry rick |
| RickDickens77: | No you're not. |
| RickDickens77: | We'll discuss it when I get home. I'm going to bed. |
| LouisTheCat: | seems early |
| RickDickens77: | Emily wants me to get off the computer, and I don't intend to explain time zones to you. |
| LouisTheCat: | oh i get it |
| LouisTheCat: | adult time |
| LouisTheCat: | hey why does she get to go with you and i dont |
| RickDickens77: | Tell you what, I'm going to go to sleep now, and you can spend the rest of my trip figuring that out for yourself. |
| LouisTheCat: | rick |
| LouisTheCat: | rick |
| LouisTheCat: | rick |
| LouisTheCat: | rick |
| RickDickens77: | WHAT |
| LouisTheCat: | im lonely |
| --------: | RickDickens77 has gone offline |